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BeckyGreenBeans's picture

Hi,

Thanks for this. I can see your creative...

44 sec ago
Oleks's picture

Hi Ed! Thank you for your comment and corrections! I...

4 hours 2 min ago
Oleks's picture

Thank you, Kealin! I will try to use shorter sentences...

4 hours 8 min ago
Oleks's picture

Hi Ed! At the time I myself was only sitting at the...

4 hours 15 min ago
Oleks's picture

Thank you, Kealin! At last not a single extra comma!

4 hours 22 min ago

Desert 13

Next come three, four and five strikes of the gong. After that, a single strike announces the end of the morning and the beginning of the afternoon. This is lunchtime until the double strike of the gong. Then again come three, four, five strikes of work-time and a single, the last one for the day, heralding the ending of the work and beginning of the evening. After that, everyone can go about their own business, except for, of course, certain groups of people: security, army, intelligence, sellers, the government, and people who just need to do more work.

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Pronunciation: 
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CategoryAdequate to goodGood to ExcellentNeeds work
Accent

The learner's ability to pronounce words shared by the people of a particular country or region of the language they are learning.

Good effort at accent. Quite close to that of a native speaker
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Excellent effort at accent. Extremely close to that of a native speaker.
People thought this
1
Limited effort at accent. Definitely a non-native speaker
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Fluency

The learner's ability to speak continuously by chunking and linking words together. For example, instead of saying very slowly, "I - am - poor. I - have - no - money" like a robot, a fluent speaker would say, "I'm poor because I don't have any money."

Speech is relatively smooth; some hesitation and unevenness caused by rephrasing and searching for words
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Smooth and fluid speech; few to no hesitations; no attempts to search for words; volume is excellent
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Speech is frequently hesitant with some sentences left uncompleted
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Intonation

The learner's ability to understand the relative emphasis that may be given to certain syllables in a word, or to certain words in a phrase or sentence

Able to identify and produce correct intonation, word stress and rhythm patterns with 50-90% accuracy.
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Able to identify and produce correct intonation, word stress and rhythm patterns with 90-100% accuracy.
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Able to identify and produce correct intonation, word stress and rhythm patterns with < 50% accuracy
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Pronunciation

The learners' ability to enunciate the various consonants, consonant blends, vowels, and vowel blends in words, words linked together, and words in sentences.

The pronunciation contained some individual word pronunciation errors. Around 3-4 errors
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The pronunciation is exceptional and mirrors a native speaker. Shows a clear understanding of word stress and intonation. Only 0-2 errors
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The pronunciation is inconsistent and made it difficult to understand. 5 or more errors
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edhutchins88's picture
I learn : Chinese (Beginner) French (Beginner) German (Beginner) Portuguese (Beginner) Spanish (Beginner) Arabic (Beginner)
5885

Hi Oleks, 

This society you describe is so well-organised and efficient. How often are workers given holidays? I hope they are not forced to work each day of the year!!

Here are some things I would like to point out...

  • Next come three, four and five strikes of the gong - Next come the third, fourth and fifth strikes of the gong (Take a look at this link: https://www.grammar-quizzes.com/adv_connective.html for more information. 
  • Then again come three, four, five strikes of work-time - After that come the third, fourth and fifth strikes of the working day. 
  • heralding the ending of the work 

 

5
Average: 5 (1 vote)
Oleks's picture
Oleks :
I learn : English (Beginner)
3654

Hi Ed! Thank you for your comment! I will write about weekdays in the continuation of my story :) About strikes: how can I write that through time intervals of one hour there was first one strike, then two strikes, then three strikes, then four strikes, then five strikes, then one strike again?

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edhutchins88's picture
I learn : Chinese (Beginner) French (Beginner) German (Beginner) Portuguese (Beginner) Spanish (Beginner) Arabic (Beginner)
5885

Hi Oleks,

Now I understand. What you have written is not wrong and I can understand it perfectly :) However, I would rephrase this slightly (in order to simplify it) to something like "over the course of an hour, the gong is struck five times. To mark the start of the next hour, the gong is struck again".

Hope that makes sense. However, if you have any further questions, please do let me know :)

5
Average: 5 (1 vote)
Oleks's picture
Oleks :
I learn : English (Beginner)
3654

Hi Ed! Thank you! I understood what you had written. I think I will change the original text.

0
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edhutchins88's picture
I learn : Chinese (Beginner) French (Beginner) German (Beginner) Portuguese (Beginner) Spanish (Beginner) Arabic (Beginner)
5885

Hi Oleks, 

This society you describe is so well-organised and efficient. How often are workers given holidays? I hope they are not forced to work each day of the year!!

Here are some things I would like to point out...

  • Next come three, four and five strikes of the gong - Next come the third, fourth and fifth strikes of the gong (Take a look at this link: https://www.grammar-quizzes.com/adv_connective.html for more information. 
  • Then again come three, four, five strikes of work-time - After that come the third, fourth and fifth strikes of the working day. 
  • heralding the ending of the work 

 

5
Average: 5 (1 vote)
kjcoffin's picture
I learn : Spanish (Intermediate)
2680

Next come three, four and five strikes of the gong. After that, a single strike announces the end of the morning and the beginning of the afternoon. This is lunchtime until the double strike of the gong. Then again come three, four, five strikes of work-time and a single, the last one for the day, heralding the ending of the work and beginning of the evening. After that, everyone can go about their own business, except for, of course, certain groups of people: security, army, intelligence, sellers, the government (no comma) and people who just need to do more work.

5
Average: 5 (1 vote)
Oleks's picture
Oleks :
I learn : English (Beginner)
3654

Hi Kealin! Thank you for your comment! It is good that I make less mistakes.

0
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Ros Watson's picture
I learn : Italian (Beginner) French (Beginner)
5519

Hi Oleks.  This is really fascinating.  I found it quite difficult to correct as it is so different from our way of life.  What I will point out though, is that 'work' is such a common word in the English language that we don't use an article before it.  So we 'go to work' but we go to 'the shops', or 'the gym', or 'the doctors'.  'School' is the same - we go 'to school' and with the word 'home' we don't even use 'to'.  We 'go home'.  I thought your audio was good.  Just be careful to annunciate 'everybody'!

Next come three, four and then five strikes of the gong. After that, a single strike announces the end of the morning and the beginning of the afternoon. This is lunchtime until the double This period is lunchtime and lasts until a double strike of the gong. Then again come three, four, five strikes for of work-time and a single strike, the last one for of the day, heralding the ending of the work and the beginning of the evening. After that, everyone can go about their own business, except for, of course, certain groups of people: security, army, intelligence, sellers, the government, and people who just need to do more work.

5
Average: 5 (1 vote)
Oleks's picture
Oleks :
I learn : English (Beginner)
3654

Hi Ros! I am glad you have not lost interest in my story. Thank you for your corrections: they are really important.

0
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