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edhutchins88's picture

Hi Oleks,

It sounds like there is trouble ahead...

6 hours 5 min ago
Oleks's picture

Thank you, Kealin!

17 hours 3 min ago
Oleks's picture

Hi Kealin! Thank you! "Won't be able to" sounds better...

17 hours 4 min ago
Oleks's picture

Hi Ed! Thank you! I will need to learn conditional...

17 hours 5 min ago
kjcoffin's picture

...

18 hours 2 min ago

Colombia

Hi ,my name is Fred , I'm French and I'm going to travel  to Colombia with my family in February. My stepdaughter is a Colombian and she will introduce us to her friends and relatives. We are looking forward to our trip and we all are eager to discover a new South American country. We have already planned to meet our stepfamily and to travel around the country either in the countryside and at the seaside in Cartagena. We definitely will taste Colombian food and its famous coffee! One bad thing though : it takes very long flying over there and we will arrive exhausted! But never mind, we can get some rest during our two weeks holidays in a hot welcoming country and come back in France with a beautiful suntan! Ciao

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CategoryAdequate to goodGood to ExcellentNeeds work
Grammatical Accuracy

The learners ability to use nouns, verbs, adjectives, etc. correctly in sentences, using verb tenses accurately, and having the correct agreement between subjects and predicates. For instance, one would say "they were" instead of "they was."

There are 3-4 grammatical errors
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There are 0-2 grammatical errors
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There are 5 or more grammatical errors
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Punctuation

The learner's ability to use certain marks to clarify meaning of their writing by grouping words grammatically into sentences and clauses and phrases.

There are 3-4 errors in capitalization and punctuation.
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There are 0-2 errors in capitalization and punctuation.
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3
There are 5 or more errors in capitalization and punctuation.
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Spelling

The learners' ability to form words with the correct letters in the correct order

There are 3-4 spelling errors
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There are 0-2 spelling errors
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There are 5 or more spelling errors
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Style

The learner's ability to tailor the written work to fit the specific context, purpose, or audience

Mostly understandable. However, there are a few errors which cause confusion.
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Easy to understand. Writing flows and keeps reader engaged.
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Quite hard to understand.
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Karin Brauner's picture
I learn : French (Beginner)
1710

Hi Fred!

Very good. Well written and it sounds friendly, approachable in register. It really conveys what you are going to be doing in Colombia and I enjoyed reading it.

I will make a few corrections in a different colour, in the text you submitted.

Hi ,my name is Fred , I'm French and I'm going to travel  to Colombia with my family in February. My stepdaughter is a (remove this word)  Colombian and she will introduce us to her friends and relatives. We are looking forward to our trip and we all are (swap around - "are all" is much better) eager to discover a new South American country. We have already planned to meet our stepfamily and to travel around the country either in the countryside and at the seaside in Cartagena. We definitely will taste Colombian food and its famous coffee! One bad thing though : it takes very long flying over there and we will arrive exhausted! But never mind, we can get some rest during our two weeks holidays in a hot welcoming country and come back in to  France with a beautiful suntan! Ciao

My Stepdaughter is Colombian.

We are all eager to discover....

either - you can say either in the countryside OR the seaside in Cartagena. or just remove "either".

Come back to France

Hope all this helps!

A personal comment - you have to try Guatemalan coffee too, it's also one of the best in the world, but I think Colombian is winning ;)

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Ros Watson's picture
I learn : Italian (Beginner) French (Beginner)
5519

Ciao Fred!

Yes - Karin is right.  Your writing is so good to read - very entertaining and you have a lovely style!  Karin has covered most of the (very small) corrections.  

If you are describing a fact rather than an intention, consider saying "I'm travelling to Columbia" and not "I'm going to travel to Columbia".  It's a frequent and very effective use of the present continuous for future events.  You could try saying "It takes a very long time to fly over there".  This is slightly more natural than "It takes very long flying over there".  Also, consider saying "We will definitely taste Columbian food"  rather than "We definitely will taste Columbian food".  "Stepfamily" is usually written as two separate words or hyphenated ("step-family").  But these are all minor points in a very well written submission.

Well done Fred.  I'm impressed!

 

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Aliakbar Majidi's picture
I learn : French (Beginner) Persian (Expert) Spanish (Beginner)
6248

Hello, Fred. Good job! Your plans sound really exciting! By now, you must have been back home. I hope you have had as much fun as you have described here.

Regarding your text, I have rewritten the whole text so that you can compare it to the original. Also, please pay attention to the punctuation and spacing. If you have any questions, do not hesitate to ask. I will be more than happy to reply

Colombia


Hi, my name is Fred. I'm French and I'm going to travel to Colombia with my family in February. My stepdaughter is Colombian and she will introduce us to her friends and relatives. We are looking forward to our trip and we are all eager to discover a new South American country. We have already planned to meet our stepfamily and to travel around the country both in the countryside and at the seaside in Cartagena. We definitely will taste Colombian food and its famous coffee! One bad thing though: it takes a very long flight to get there and we will arrive exhausted! But never mind! We can get some rest during our two-week holidays in a hot welcoming country and come back to France with a beautiful suntan! Ciao

Keep posting and improving! Good luck!


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